Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Join the brigade...

We devour the Left with truth and common sense. We are...

The Flying Space Monkey has landed...

... in the anniversary Carnival of Comedy.
(and he finally remembered to put my submission in!)

Bad news for the Canadian tourism industry

It looks like the Canadian dollar is getting stronger...
TORONTO (CP) - Stock markets opened modestly higher while the Canadian dollar cracked 90 cents US Tuesday morning, setting new 28-year highs amid optimism for the economy and higher oil and gold prices.
The loonie opened at 90.13 cents US, up 0.3 cent and traded later in the morning at 90.16, after rising 0.38 cent on Monday.
The Conservative minority federal government will present its first budget at 4 p.m. EDT, after financial markets close, but this wasn't a major factor in the latest loonie surge, said Shaun Osborne, chief currency strategist at Scotia Capital.
He suggested that the currency could rise to 92.5 cents US over the next few weeks, with "a continuation of gradual Canadian-dollar appreciation over the medium to longer term as well."

Which means the U.S. tourist dollar won't go as far in the Great White North. So you might not see as many of us (which, given the way some folks up there treat cars with American license plates, probably would be a good thing).
But you conservatives can come on down, because now your dollars will go farther here.
Looking forward to seeing you.

Monday, May 01, 2006

The legend of Jimmie Webbfoot

A great discovery has been made.
The legend of Jimmie Webbfoot will live forever.
Now, direct from the CBC Office of Canadian Music Fascism comes the Lost Jimmie Webbfoot Collection.
Hear the all-time best from the Troubadour of the Prairies, the aboriginal artist from the Watchagondoo band in Uranium City, Saskatchewan, in these treasures that have been lost for years. Thrill to "By The Time I Get To Kamloops"...
By the time I get to Kamloops she'll be rising
She'll find the note I left hangin' on her door
She'll laugh when she reads the part that says I'm leavin'
'Cause I've left that girl so many times before
By the time I make Alberta she'll be working
She'll prob'ly stop at lunch and give me a call
But she'll just hear that phone keep on ringin'
Off the wall that's all
By the time I make it to Brandon she'll be sleepin'
She'll turn softly and call my name out loud
And she'll cry just to think I'd really leave her
Tho' time and time I try to tell her so
She just didn't know I would really go.
Remember legends past, like "Transcona Park"...
Transcona Park is melting in the dark,
all the winter ice pack flowing down...
And there was "Saskatoon"...
Saskatoon, oh Saskatoon, I am so afraid of dying
Before I dry the tears she's crying
Before I hear your wolfhounds braying at the moon
In Saskatoon. In Saskatoon.
And "Out, Out and Away"...
Would you like to ride in my beautiful pontoon?
Relax the nights and days in my beautiful pontoon?
We can hit the lake and feel like we'll touch the sky.
Come on and try, come on and try.
Out, out and away in my beautiful, my beautiful pontoon.
Don't forget this lament for days gone by in "Where's The Hay Gone, Lucy?"
Where's the hay gone, Lucy?
It used to grow right here before they built the mall.
And there's so much more from the legendary Jimmie Webbfoot.
But that's not all when you get the Lost Jimmie Webbfoot Collection. You'll get this collection of Canadian Classicks.
Dig Leonard Skinner's "Sweet Home Nova Scotia"...
In Halifax they love the parliament
Now we all did what we could do
Now Adscam does not bother me
Does your conscience bother you?
Tell the truth
Sweet home Nova Scotia
Where the skies are so blue
Sweet Home Nova Scotia
Lord, I'm coming home to you
Here I come Nova Scotia
Then there's Pequeno's "Ottawa Summer"...
Ottawa summer is on its way
The pols are gone, we all can play
Ain’t no black clouds filled with taxes
No lyin' cheats to well astound us
And the Ad Libidos' classic "The Boy From Quebec City"...
Ooo wah, ooo wah cool, cool kitty
Tell us about the boy from Quebec City
Ooo wah, ooo wah c’mon kitty
Tell us about the boy from Quebec City
He just speaks French
A real mensch
And he puts Toronto boys right on the bench
And the blues are Canadian, too, as Blind Bill croons those "Vancouver Blues"...
I woke up this morning, I had them Vancouver blues,
I woke up this morning, had them Vancouver blues.
Tired of Eastside junkies, Lord, I really have paid my dues.
This dynomite set also includes "Great Alberta Freedom" by R.K. Dwight...
`Cause I live and breathe this great Alberta freedom
From the day that I was born I've waved the flag
Great Alberta freedom took me knee-high to a man
Yeah gave me peace of mind my daddy never had
Order now, The Lost Jimmie Webbfoot Collection and Canadian Classicks.
All proceeds benefit the CBC Liberal Survival Fund.
With apologies and great regards to Jimmy Webb, Elton John, Lynyrd Skynyrd, the Ad Libs, and Poco.

Needless to say, they were empty

In Cyprus, they've set a record of a unique kind...
PAPHOS, Cyprus (AP) - Campaigners in Cyprus on Sunday said they had created the world's longest chain of bras to raise awareness of breast cancer and win a place in the Guinness Book of Records.
The activists said they managed to string together some 114,000 bras, beating the current record held in Singapore since 2003, of 79,000 bras.
"We know how many bras we have and we have beaten the record," said Gina Ghillyer, an activist with the local cancer patients support group that organized the event.
Hundreds of people assembled at this seaside city's small harbour early Sunday to help form a colourful chain of bras donated from around the world.
Unfortunately, no photos were available to document this claim at this time.

Coming attractions...

The cracked research team here at either orr has come across a recording of a little-known Canadian music legend.
We'll have more details on this stunning event sometime in the next few days.