Dirty Laundry 2006

Back in the late 1980s, Don Henley was tired of the negative gossipmongering he heard on the TV news and wrote the anthem "Dirty Laundry."
It needs updating to reflect what's really going on.
Now, for your dancing and listening pleasure, we present "Dirty Laundry 2006"...

I used to be the anchor on the evening news.
Now I'm on my own, with everything to lose.
I've got the untrustworthy blues.
That's my dirty laundry.
I used to have the power, but I'm not alone.
Ratings are a-fallin' while the Web has grown.
The winds of change have fully blown
the cover off our dirty laundry.
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down

See the bubble-headed bleached blonde. She hates George Bush.
When Bill was in the White House he would fondle her tush.
We're certain that her brain is mush.
That's her dirty laundry.
See the foreign correspondent in a Baghdad hotel.
He couldn't tell an Iraqi from a snowball in hell.
He thinks al-Qaeda is just swell.
That's his dirty laundry.
See the snarky old reporter from the New York Times.
She used to be respected, but now she's despised.
She fills her prose with left-wing lies.
That's her dirty laundry.
We don't have a clue now, we just have to pass.
We wouldn't know the truth if it bit us in the a**.
Cut us off now at the pass.
Burn our dirty laundry.
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down

See the former star producer; she don't work here.
Fake but accurate don't work now; let me make myself clear.
Go cry in someone else's beer.
Stuff your dirty laundry.
If we really want to find out what's going on
We don't look to you and your tired old song.
To us, you're going, going, gone
with the dirty laundry.
See them spew their diarrhea, they can't handle the facts.
It certainly appears they all ODed on Ex-Lax.
They're nothin' but a bunch of hacks
Sellin' dirty laundry.
Now your stupid ratings are in the tank.
That's a rubber check you're trying to take to the bank.
We know your mind's a total blank.
Bleep your dirty laundry.